Tame Your Mood is a monthly newsletter focused on the noble challenge of overcoming anxiety and depression. Psychotherapy for depression and anxiety requires many approaches, among which is the critical need to develop your understanding of what these wild moods actually are, how they work and function, and how we can get ensnared. These writings are here to help you build an understanding that supports the uprooting of the wild moods.
Below, you will find about 10 years of writings to help you understand the wild moods more deeply, practices to experiment with, and hopefully inspiration that anxiety and depression are not permanent, and there is actually a way out of them.
Following on from last month, this month’s article looks at something underneath the “culture wars”, and regular wars, of recent times, the violent clash of beliefs without communication. I’m looking here at the essential reason why there’s a refusal to entertain (“to receive someone as a guest”) the worldviews of others that give rise to their beliefs. It’s not due to confusion, or if it is, it’s a strategic confusion.
May these difficult times be met with heartfulness, companionship, appropriate combat (as necessary), wisdom, and more than anything, the willingness and resources to practice growth.
I thought this might be a good time to talk about depression as it relates to current events, since there seems to be a lot of them events currently. Contentious politics, shaky democracy, a pandemic, culture wars, and now an actual war in Europe, amongst whatever local crises might be happening for us individually. The basic question here is how, in depressing times, we can avoid becoming depressed.
There are a lot of facets to the question—it goes to the heart of what depression actually is—but in this newsletter, I’ll just address the general subject, and in future letters, more granular parts.
In line with that: may you find, even with all that’s going on, some appreciation of the changing seasons, and some portion of an absurd, indefensible, dog-with-a-bone hope and trust in the Goodness of things.
I hope that your Thanksgiving went well (all things about these times considered), and that in an incredibly difficult year, you have been able to keep, more or less, your footing. Which is a thought that is apropos to the topic for this newsletter, continuing on with the theme of basic issues regarding depression (following on from the previous ones on gratitude, experimentation, and futility), this article will focus on the nature of “self-regulation,” and its centrality to depression and depression’s healing. It’s a big topic, arguably the most important in understanding, but I’m hoping this gives you a sense of the terrain.
Here’s to wishing an entry into the new year characterized by poise and equanimity.
I’m continuing on here with the idea that there are certain core elements or phenomenon in depression that would really behoove every depressive to know about. And this month’s focus, futility, is dead center in what depression is about. Not that ever knowing these “depression axioms” will be the cure itself; depression requires work and training (link), but it also needs a good theoretical understanding.
May you be staying safe, but also using this difficult time to learn and grow.
This is the second in a series of articles concerning the basic principles for healing depression. Last month (link) concerned the practice and purpose of gratitude, and this month will look at the importance of working with depression from an experimental mode. This means that, when trying to influence depression (changing negative thinking, being active rather than de-motivated, etc.), we set up those attempts in our own minds as experiments. Basically, “What happens when I do X?”, which itself acts as an antidote to the dogmatic assertions of depression.
May you all be safe, supported, related, and striving towards wisdom in these amazing times.
I’m going to start a run of articles, beginning with this newsletter, on basic tools and ideas related to healing depression (I’m holding here that “coping” or “managing” are not very meaningful if they’re not contributing to healing). It seems like a good time to review basics. So, this article will be about gratitude, what it is and how to engage it, and some suggestions about how to practice.
May you all be finding grounding, companionship, inspiration and wisdom during these turbulent times.
In these incredible, and incredibly difficult times, we all need to pay attention to the non-negotiable rules of balance, not to the negation of action, but to actually make those engagements sustainable. In my more political 20’s, I saw over and over in my activist peers, and in myself, the tendency towards burnout, almost as a badge of honor. It doesn’t work, not for sustained social change, nor for sustained personal survival.
So in this month’s article, I offer some particular suggestions about ways to orient to this time. Especially with those of you with a history of depression, the need to be aware and careful with your own levels of energy and overwhelm is even more important at inflamed times like this.
This is a discussion of the central depression concept of “ungrieved futility”, from a podcast interview I did with Sidewalk Talk.
(You can save a copy to your computer by right clicking on the audio bar–i.e., that shows the progress of the recording–and then clicking “save audio as…”)
Last month, I was interviewed on the Sidewalk Talk podcast by my friend and colleague, Traci Ruble. Sidewalk Talk is a project to bring empathic listening to the streets, literally: volunteers set up chairs on sidewalks all over the world, and fellow humans get to sit down for a bit, and just be heard without judgment or trying to be fixed. It’s a brilliant and heartful idea, and Traci has added this podcast to help support the hundreds of volunteers with different interviewees offering different perspectives on how to understand the project, and stay inspired.
So below are a few notes about the interview, and the link to the audio recording. Enjoy.
As the coronavirus keeps washing through the world, and many of us are paused in one way or another, the question of how to use this time keeps arising. There are many answers, of course, from topical to deep, and it’s to the latter that I address this month’s article. Depression often is phrased in terms of control or management of it, often as a medicalized condition, but it has a deep relationship to faith—the choice to remain open in the face of the unknown—that is not obvious on the surface.
So here, I’m suggesting a couple questions intended to help you parse out when depression is speaking in its “anti-faith,” and to expand your attention beyond the contracted and stifling confines that depression tries to impose.
